Card StatsVignette
Lest You Endanger Yourself
Gymnasium
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Owww! |
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You got hit, Crabby, so you're out. |
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Yo, just so we're clear, we're playing BASKETBALL, not dodgeball! Stop trying to hit me with the ball, please. I swear I've told you like a HUNDRED times. And lay off with the weird nickname while you're at it. Back me up here, Jamil. This isn't what you're supposed to do in the Basketball Club! |
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Trying to convince Floyd otherwise is a futile endeavor, but I'll try. Just don't get your hopes up. Floyd! Could you please take this seriously? I'm sure you're aware that the next tournament is coming up soon. |
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What? You got a problem, buddy? |
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Obviously. Now, if you would be so kind as to flip whatever switch makes you take things seriously. Club activities ARE recorded on your tran— *ahem* What would you do if we suffered defeat at the next tournament? I doubt you'd be pleased. |
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Mm... |
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All right. Now's my chance to leave the court and— |
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Okay, forget dodgeball. Next up is a dance-off! |
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Where in the world did that come from?! I seriously can't understand how your brain works. And you, Jamil! Where do you think you're sneaking off to?! |
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Tch. You got me. You cannot reason with Floyd when he's in one of his moods. Just let him do whatever he wants to do until he's had enough. I'm done with this farce. The rest of you can go ahead and dance or assault each other with balls or whatever. |
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Hey, don't push all the work onto us underclassmen. Floyd's totally wildin' out, man! What're we supposed to do? |
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I've always wanted to try doing a headspin! You spin around like a top while balancing on your head! Like this, maybe? Oof! I fell right on the ol' tailbone. Aha ha, it's totally impossible. I can't keep my balance. |
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See? You can't shove that off on us poor freshmen. |
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Now see here, Floyd... You cannot perform a headspin if you haven't first mastered the art of the headstand. You need a sturdier foundation. You're wobbling so much that even if you did manage to launch into a spin, it wouldn't last very long. Moreover, you must place your center of gravity at your core, lest you put too much weight on your neck and endanger yourself. |
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Whoa... |
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Where'd that come from? How'd you learn all that stuff? |
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Ah! Drat. I couldn't help myself. You were being so reckless that my passion for dancing got the better of me. |
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You have a passion for dancing? |
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Uh, sounds like it was way more than "briefly." But whatever. This is Basketball Club. We're supposed to be playing basketball, not dancing. |
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Y-you are quite right. I'm well aware. That is enough dancing, Floyd. It's time for basketball. Don't make me repeat myself. |
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Hey, is a headstand basically as simple as standing upside-down on your head? I heard ya, but I guess I still don't get it! Howzabout you show me how it's done, Sea Snake. |
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Show you? Absolutely not. We're supposed to be playing basketball, not— |
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Fine! Be that way. I'll just do it myself. First I gotta put my head on the floor, then get a spin going, and... whoa! |
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Wha—stop! |
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Owww. I flopped again. |
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Don't try to spin on your own. I told you that if you don't properly lower your center of gravity, you risk breaking your neck. Why must you always be so irresponsible? Dancing is not a thing to be taken lightly. It requires proper form. Headspins may appear flashy, but if you do not follow the proper steps, you'll immediately lose your balance. Novices should start with... Hah! Holding this position. |
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Aaand now Jamil's doing a headstand too. |
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From here, you spread your legs, stretching them until you stop wavering and properly establish your center of gravity. Once you've accomplished that, you press against the floor with the palms of your hands and gradually rotate yourself. Do it slowly and steadily at first. Speed up once you feel you're in control, then let your hands go. There. You understand now? |
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Wow! That's it! That's EXACTLY what I was trying to do! You're awesome, Sea Snake. |
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Am I? *ahem* To increase the difficulty, you can curl yourself up as you spin to make yourself look like a ball. You can also hold your legs straight above you to do a drill, or alternatingly bend and stretch your legs as you spin. |
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Wow, you're good! You gotta teach me how to do that. I'll take it seriously, I promise. |
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Then start with a handstand. Mhm... Good. Now pull in your jaw and relax your throat... |
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Dude, I'm so over this. I've totally lost them. I would've never pegged Jamil as a breakdancer, though. Talk about the surprise of a lifetime. |
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