Card StatsVignette
This Is the Pits, Man (Part One)
Classroom
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Floyd Leech, would you care to explain yourself? |
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You're turning in my quiz completely blank. I can only conclude that you crave a taste of my signature discipline. |
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How long are you going to stay silent? Even puppies bark back when spoken to. |
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...Aroo. There. Are we done yet, or did you have more barbs to sling my way? All this nagging is really harshin' my vibe. |
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...... You're bold, Younger Leech. I'll give you that much. |
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I ain't "younger." I ain't "older," either, but c'mon. |
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I suggest you exercise more discretion in deciding who you bare your fangs at... ...you BAD DOG! |
Stairway
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...... |
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Oh, hello, Floyd. Heading back to the dorm? ...What's wrong? You're glowering. |
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Professor Beakfish chewed my head off and assigned me a fifty-page apology essay as punishment. |
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"Beakfish"? Like the black-and-white striped beakfish? Oh, you must be talking about Professor Crewel. What did you do to incur his wrath this time? |
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Literally nothin'. I didn't feel like takin' a quiz, so I left it blank. I'm not the only guy with low grades in that class, so how come I'm the only one he singles out? |
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Didn't you score a perfect 100 on your last test? Of course he'd think you were slacking on purpose if you went from a 100 to a 0. |
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Maaaan... This is lame. |
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Ah, hello, Jade. Impeccable timing. If you could help me take these printouts for our class— Ack! Floyd! |
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Of course, Riddle. I'll take half of them. |
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I wouldn't have said anything if I'd known you were with Floyd. |
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Who are you calling a goldfish, and how many times must I tell you to stop using that— |
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I'm goin' for a walk. |
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All right. I expect you'll return with a clear head? |
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Beats me. |
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He's awfully taciturn today. Is he in another one of his snits? |
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Mhm. He occasionally has episodes like this. Today seems to be hitting him especially hard. |
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He's too moody by half, if you ask me. Is there a reason for it? |
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Hard to say. For Floyd, anything could be the switch that sets him off. Problems and pet peeves have no bearing on it. My brother is simply an eccentric genius. Sometimes he can pull off spells that amaze his teachers, and sometimes he produces so little that they chastise him in their frustration. |
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Hm. How troublesome that must be. |
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Personally, I like it best when Floyd's in his element, enjoying things as they come. Conversely, I suppose it's nicer for you when Floyd's out of sorts, since it means he's not picking on you. ...Or do you actually miss it? |
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Certainly not. I rather like not being under constant attack, I'll have you know. Now, let's get these printouts to the classroom. |
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Right. I just hope Floyd's feeling better by the time he returns to the dorm. |
Courtyard
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My mood's in the gutter, I've got no energy... This is the pits, man. |
Savanaclaw Student A |
Ow! |
Savanaclaw Student B |
Hey, who thinks they can just bump into me without apologizin' or— Erk! F-F-Floyd! |
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Savanaclaw Student A |
S-sorry! We didn't know it was you... |
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Savanaclaw Student B |
Look, uh, we don't want any trouble, so... |
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Huh? Nah, don't feel like starting any. |
Savanaclaw Student A |
Wait, really? |
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I said it's cool, okay? So how about you scram already before you make me wanna ruin YOUR day, too? |
Savanaclaw Students |
G-going now! |
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This Is the Pits, Man (Part Two)
Courtyard
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Ugh. Why's this place gotta be occupied the ONE time I don't want any company? |
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O apples of the apple tree, I bid thee turn purple... Purple... There! Colors, change! Aw, man! It went pink. That's close, but still. |
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How's that close? You can't even call it color- changing magic if your subject doesn't turn the correct color. |
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Big words comin' from the guy who literally can't turn anything any color but black. |
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Hm? Oh, hello, Floyd. |
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Hey, Macky. Hey, Crabby. |
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Yo, Floyd. You might wanna steer clear of this. We're practicing color-changing magic, and SOMEONE might wing you with a wild shot. |
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The only "hue" you're good at is being a huuuge dummy. Watch yourself, Floyd. His color-changing isn't as stable as mine. It might burn your eyes. |
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Who're you to criticize MY aim, Deadeye Deuce? |
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For cryin' out loud... Do you guys EVER stop? What're you doin' bickering over baby magic like color-changing? Do you guys wanna get wrung out like a couple of dirty dishrags, or what? |
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Hey. Is it just me, or is Floyd in a fouler mood than usual? |
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He's prone to pretty big mood swings. I see it from him in the Basketball Club sometimes. Just when you think he's playing and having a blast, next thing you know, he's totally over it and turns into dead weight on the court. |
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Yikes. Sounds rough. ...Hey, he sat on a bench. Is he seriously about to take a break out here? |
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Hey, uh, Floyd? Like I was saying before, we're practicing applied magic right now. I'm kinda worried that if you chill there, what we're doing might end up bothering you, y'know? |
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Excuse me? Last I checked, it's a free country. I can sit wherever I want. |
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Well, okay. We'll go somewhere else, then. |
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Pfft. Are you suggesting I can't evade your lame attempts at magic? |
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We, uh... We didn't mean... |
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I guess we can stay here and keep practicing, if that's how you want it. Seriously, though - don't come crying to us if we hit you. |
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..... |
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Great. Now he's ignoring us. ... Wait, is he sleeping? |
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...Zzz. |
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It's hard to keep up with this guy. |
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Yo. Deuce. Whatever you do, do NOT send any spells in Floyd's direction. I don't want any trouble. |
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What do you take me for? The bench is in the opposite direction of the apple tree. Of course I'm not gonna point my magic that way. |
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You'd better not! I mean it! ...And no sooner do I get the words out of my mouth than you do it again. You realize I was being sarcastic when I called you "Deadeye Deuce," right? Are you TRYING to give me a goth makeover here? |
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What about your apples? I heard you say gold, so why's this one white? |
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Oh, shut it. I'm gonna recenter myself and take it from the top. Deep breaths, in and out... There! Hey, it's your turn. Get on with it. |
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I hear you. Colors, change! |
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I LITERALLY SAID NOT TO AIM THAT WAY! MULTIPLE TIMES! |
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...Erk. Oh no... |
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Huh. My clothes... |
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F-Floyd's labwear is practically a kaleidoscope now, after that color-changing magic... |
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Welp. It's curtains for us, Deadeye. |
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..... |
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Forgive me, Floyd! Sir! I didn't mean to do it! How can I ever make this up to you?! |
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I had nothin' to do with this. It was aaall Deuce, for the record. |
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I wouldn't have done it if you weren't rushing me! |
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Say what? YOU'RE the one who was- |
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Aha... |
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Aha? |
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Aha ha! I didn't know you could be so incompetent at basic baby magic! You guys are hopeless! Look at this complete mess of colors I've got going from head to toe. Pinks, blues, yellows... What color were you even going for? It's kinda funny bein' this colorful! |
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He's laughing? Does that mean...he's in better spirits now? |
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W-we're saved! |
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Now I wanna give it a whirl! Heck, I'll give you guys some color-changing pointers while I'm at it. |
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Who is he, and what has he done with Floyd...? |
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